Incredible Japan - 10 Lessons To Learn From A Grieving But Great Nation!

1. THE CALM!

Not a single visual of chest-beating or wild grief. Sorrow itself has been elevated.

2. THE DIGNITY!

Disciplined queues for water and groceries. Not a rough word or a crude gesture.

3. THE ABILITY!

The incredible architects, for instance. Many Buildings swayed but didn't fall.

4. THE GRACE!

People bought only what they needed for the present, so everybody could get something.

5. THE ORDER!

No looting in shops. No honking and no overtaking on the roads. Just understanding.

6. THE SACRIFICE!

Fifty workers stayed back to pump sea water in the N-reactors. How will they ever be repaid?

7. THE TENDERNESS!

Restaurants cut prices. An unguarded ATM is left alone. The strong cared for the weak.

8. THE TRAINING!

The old and the children, everyone knew exactly what to do. And they did just that.

9. THE MEDIA!

They showed magnificent restraint in the bulletins. No silly reporters.  Only calm reportage.

10. THE CONSCIENCE!

When the power went off in a store, people put things back on the shelves and left quietly.

Ingekuwa BONGO, vipi hapo... kama nakuona!

Jamani, sio kila kitu ni cha kuiga!

Some cultures are not meant for some of us who are truly traditionalists, so don’t copy some of these western things which might not be applicable to some cultures in Africa , so stick to the games you know, angalia chini jamaa anavyoaibika!

 Mambo mengine kama kuvaa suruali kwa dada zetu, kuacha vitovu wazi, nk. vyote hivi sii utamaduni wetu! Madhara yake akina dada wanajiaibisha na kujirahisisha bila sababu. kisa, eti kwenda na wakati... Aibu tupu...

ANGALIZO KWA WAPENDANAO!

A couple that has been married for 20 years were both recently diagnosed with diabetes.

Findings later showed that they both contracted the disease as a result of the names they called each other like; Honey pie, Sweetie, Sugar, Sweet heart, Sugar Banana, Sweet potato, Hot chocolate, Candy bar, Black forest, etc.

Please prevent diabetes by starting early, by calling your spouse names like; Baby bitters, Ginger, Chloroquine, Piriton, Pepper fruit, embe dodo, kitunguu saumu, kuku wa kienyeji, dogo dogo, etc.

Have a healthy & sugar-free romantic life

Loliondo kwa Babu...

BREAKING NEWS...

by senior international correspondent, bongotambarare, Lagos.

Chinese couple in Lagos gave birth to a black baby and Dear husband asked Dear wife... Chu, why baby black? She replied... We live in Nigeria, no electricity... Me hot, u hot, sex hot... Baby burnt!

Picha ya mrembo wa leo...

Italian History

Poor Larry...

Silly Larry........... 

Larry alipochoka kufanya kazi zake akazima taa, akambusu mkewe, akalala na usingizi mzito ukampitia. Mara akamwona mwanamme amesimama kitandani.

"Toka hapa nani wewe unakuja kitandani kwangu?"
"mimi ni mtakatifu Petro na hapa si kitandani kwako bali ni mbinguni"
"Ina maana nimekufa? Mbona mimi bado kijana? Naomba unirudishe duniani."

"Inawezekana, lakini siwezi kukurudisha kama mtu, labda nikurudishe kama mbwa au kuku"

Larry akakumbuka mbwa anavyopata taabu ya kulinda, "Bora nirudi kama kuku"

Mara akajikuta yuko kwenye banda, akiwa kuku jike na matakoni kunawaka

moto. Akamwona jogoo pembeni, akamwambia shida yake.

" Kaka ninasikia moto matakoni, inakuwaje?"
"Kwani hujawahi kutaga weye?" Jogoo akamjibu kwa maringo.
"Sijawahi"
"Chuchumaa, kamua kwa nguvu yai litoke."
Basi akakamua, yai la kwanza likatoka, akakamua tena yai la pili hilo !
Akiwa anataka kukamua yai la tatu akasikia sauti ya mke wake.

"Larry, pumbavu wewe, unakunya kitandani!"

Kwa wanaume wabishi...

wapo watu, sijui ni kwa nini hasa. Lakini wakimaliza haja zao hawaoshi mikono! Wengi ni akina baba... sasa haya masinki ni kiboko yao. Hapo lazima wataosha mikono tuu... au?

Jirani akichoshwa...

Bwana Harusi akipelekwa kwenye SOLO!

cartoons of the day... furahii day!

she is searching 4 a seriuos boyfriend.

Mwandishi wetu, ZNZ.

Binti mmoja mrembo wa kiasi anatafuta mpenzi, ni msichana wa miaka 22 anatafuta mpenzi wa kuishi nae, yuko zanzinbar na angependa ampate alie kua serius. Plz guys, she hates pretenders, she want kind hearted man sense of humor age btwn 25-40. her contacts are no..+255656279694.

 

ALL THE BEST M-DADA, UBARIKIWE KWA UJASIRI HUU. NA NAAMINI UTAFANIKIWA, UKIFANIKIWA UTUJULISHE. KICHWANGUMU.

Bongo Tambarare...

have a nice laugh...

1. A daughter sent a telegram to her father on passing her B.Ed exams, which the father received as "Father, your daughter has been successful in BED."
2. A husband, while on a business trip to a hill station sent a telegram to his wife "I wish you were here." The message received by the wife was "I wish you were her."
3. A man wanted to celebrate his wife's Birthday by throwing a party. So he ordered a birthday cake. The salesman asked him what message he
wanted put on the cake. He thought for a moment and said, put "getting older but you are getting better". The salesman asked "how do you want me to put it?"

The man said  well...put "You are getting older" at the top and "but you are getting better" at the bottom. When the cake was unveiled at the party
all the guests were aghast at the message on the cake.
It read: "You are getting older at the top, but you are getting better at the bottom"

Dogo tundu...

Mtoto wa kiume ni wa kiume tuu... tangu utoto utaona tabia zake. sasa hapo kwenye sanamu la dukani anachungulia nini?????

Mdudu...

Jumamosi kama ya leo, kuna wadau wangu wawili wako dodoma, wanne wako moshi, wawili wako arusha, dar ndo usiseme... wakipata hii 'menu' wanaamini kuna stability kwenye shughuli zao za week-end! Niwataje????

Military posse...

You got to keep the old motor running...

The marriage of an 80 year old white man and a 20 year old white woman was the talk of the town.
After being married a  year, the couple went to the hospital for the birth of their first child.
The attending nurse came out of the delivery room to congratulate the old gentleman and said,
"This is amazing. How do you do it at your age?"
The old man grinned and said, "You got to keep the old motor running."
The following  year, the couple returned to the hospital for the birth of their second child.
The same nurse  was attending the delivery and  again went out to congratulate the old gentleman.
She said, "Sir, you are something! How do you manage it?"
The old man grinned and said, "You gotta keep the old motor running."
A year later, the couple returned to the hospital for the birth of their third child.
The same nurse was there for this birth also and, after the delivery, she once again approached the old gentleman, smiled, and said, "Well, you surely are something awesome! How do you do it?"

The old man replied, "It's like I've told you before, you gotta keep the old motor running."

The nurse, still smiling, patted him on the back and said: "Well, I guess  it's time to change the oil.
This one is black!"

Rachelle Lefevre enjoying at the beach with a friend...

Mobile Phones are very personal...

Turn off the f***** answering machine...

Miller...

Need me say more?

ndugu zangu wa kileo...

wa-kisasa...

What an advert...

Je wajua? Kwamba...

DEMAND CASH B4 SEX...

Man went to a pub with his wife. When he left for the counter a prostitute approached his wife & whispered "DEMAND CASH B4 SEX," he doesn't PAY!

 

The wife gets angry and starts shouting at the unfaithful husband for going out with prostitutes.The husband advises the wife that they leave the pub and go home to sort out the problem.

They book a cab but on the way the wife continues shouting and the Taxi driver stops and tells the man, "You, every time you book my taxi you always argue with your prostitutes,get out of my car"THE WIFE GOT MAD.THE HUSBAND COLLAPSED.

Now you know why husbands don't go with their wives to bars or Night clubs... kichwangumu

Ubechezzz...

Nakumbukia enzi zangu na wadauz pale Ilala, akina Emma Kuyamba, Deo Kipaka, Marehemu Jumbe, Juma Sanga, n.k (Mwenyezi Mungu azipumzishe roho zao mahali pema peponii, amina) ilikuwa sinia likutua tuu, nyama zote mkono wa kushoto, then shughuli inaendelea. Suala la usafi sijui nini, hiyo baadae... tumewapoteza wengi sana Pius Paul (R.I.P) na wengineo... DUH!

Mke wa mtu ni sumu...

Habari nyepesi nyepesi...

Jamaa alichukua simu ya GF wake, akaipigia ili aone ameseviwa kwa jina gani, alichokiona hakuamini. Alikuta jina la "MBWA KOKO JEUSI TIIII!" Yaliyofuatia si vizuri kusimulia!

What a stu*** joke...

A married woman was having a really nice time with one of her boyfriends when there was a sudden knock on the door.

Thinking that it was her husband, she instructed the man to jump into the ceiling only to find it was another boyfriend.

When the 2nd boyfriend was about to make love to her, the real hubby came.  Boyfriend 2 had no other option except to jump into the ceiling also. "How are we getting out of here?" asked # 2 to #1 "I do not know about you, for me I am going as soon as the hubby starts making love to the wife.

When the time came, # 1 jumped naked from the ceiling , landed on the bed and said,

"I am Jesus, God shall bless you with a baby girl!
He quickly vanished. # 2 quickly followed and panting said

I am Satan have you seen Jesus?"
"He went that way." the hubby replied

Matukio katika picha...

 hivi vivazi vingine bana.... aaah!

hawa sungura vipi? wanakula widi.....

Richmond - Rex - Tanesco... is this true...

Rex Attorneys huenda ikakabiliwa kashfa ya mgongano wa maslahi

Kwa mujibu wa thread iliyoanzishwa na Vuvuzela hivi leo, kampuni ya mawakili ijulikanayo kwa jina la Rex Attorneys, iliwahi kuwa mwakilishi wa Richmond Development Corporation(RDC) hapa nchini. Kama hivyo ndivyo, ni dhahiri kampuni hiyo ilikiuka miiko ya taaluma (profession misconduct), kwa kuwakilisha TANESCO katika kesi ambayo ilifunguliwa dhidi yake na kampuni iliyorithi mkataba wa mteja wake wa zamani. Nakaribisha maoni zaidi katika suala hili.

 

source: JamiiForum

 

My take: Kama hii ni kweli, basi bongo ni tambarare kwa sana tuu... na bado!

KICHWANGUMU.

Shule ya msingi kwa majirani zetu...

Mambo ya X-Mas

 Holiday season... wadau, muwe makini.

Dogo na X-mas...

Dogo akijidai siku kama ya leo, sijui nani kaiweka hapo... DUH!

AYUBAAA!!!!!

AYUBA bought a new mobile.
     He sent a message to everyone from his Phone Book & said,
     'My Mobile No. Has changed.
     Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610'

     ============ ========= ========= ======
     AYUBA : I am Proud, coz my son is in Medical College.
     Friend: Really, what is he studying.
     AYUBA: No, he is not studying, they are Studying him.

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ===
     AYUBA: Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
     DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
     AYUBA : Can I take it  tomorrow, tonight is final game.

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ====
     AYUBA : If I die, will u remarry?
     Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
     AYUBA : No, I'll also stay with your sister.

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ==
     AYUBA : People consider me as a 'GOD'
     Wife: How do you know??
     AYUBA : When I went to the Park today, everybody said,
     Oh GOD! U have come again..

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ====
     AYUBA complained to the police: 'Sir, all items are missing,
     except the TV in my house.'
     Police: 'How the thief did not take TV?'
     AYUBA : 'I was watching TV news...'

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ==
     AYUBA  comes back 2 his car & find a note saying 'Parking Fine'
     He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole 'Thanks for compliment.'

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ======
     How do you recognize AYUBA  in School?
     He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases
     the board.

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ========
     Once  AYUBA was walking he had a glove on one hand and not on other.
     So the man asked him why he did so. He replied that the weather forecast
     announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would
     be hot.

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ==
     AYUBA  in a bar and his cellular phone rings. He picks it up and
     Says 'Hello, how did you know I was here?'

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ===
     AYUBA : Why are all these people running?
     Man - This is a race, the winner will get the cup
     AYUBA  - If only the winner will get the cup, why others running?

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ===
     Teacher: 'I killed a person' convert this sentence into future tense
     AYUBA : The future tense is 'u will go to jail'

     ============ ========= ========= ========= ========= =====
     AYUBA told his servant: 'Go and water the plants!'
     Servant: 'It's already raining.'
     AYUBA : 'So what? Take an umbrella and go.'

Hapo Mzee mzima Philip kajamba au????

Did Philip Fart? What do you think? The expressions are priceless! Look at the Queen's face!

Matukio kipindi cha sikukuu...

Mshahara utasubiriwa mpaka utoke... ukishapatikana tuu! ni kama ifuatavyo...

 bata kwa sanaaaaaaaaaaa..... gwede gwede mpaka lyamba!

Jamani tuzingatie haki za watoto...

kama wewe ni mzazi au mlezi basi yakubali majukumu yako na uyazingatie... si haki na haipendezi kumbambika mtoto mdogo kiasi hichi majukumu makubwa ya kuhudumia familia kwa kiwango hiki. kwa kweli haipendezi hata kidogo, hivi na hapa tutasema tunasubiri serikali uchukue hatua kweli???? Tubadilike, serikali ni sisi... mimi, wewe, yule na huyu! basi na kila mmoja wetu atimize wajibu wake kutokana na nafasi yake. Mtoto kama huyo pichani anapaswa aende shule, akitoka acheze kiasi na kusaidia kazi anazomudu! sio kuteseka kiasi hichi...  

'tafakari...'

Tukumbuke tulipotoka...

Je, mnaweza kukumbuka hapa ni wapi na ilikuwa kipindi gani????